The Bug

It is time!!! It’s not unusual to wish to start a diet or lose pounds or start new good habits. However, every now and then someone gets the bug. That bug that motivates you and makes quitting impossible. It comes when you reach that point of finally being tired of being tired of being tired of feeling fat, ugly, unproductive, unspiritual, un-put together, un-whatever you feel like you’re failing at in life. I’ve hit that point. Here’s my story.

I am 27 years old, have been married to a wonderful man 4 years, and have an 8 month old son. I was one of those lucky few who never struggled with their weight. I could eat anything and I had a smoking hot, slim body. Until I got married… Living with a very picky man who eats mainly junk on top of an aging metabolism created some love handles. Over time those love handles grew. Then I got pregnant. I had to eat constantly to feed my constantly hungry and constantly morning sick tummy. Those love handles turned into full body love handles. Now I am at least 33 pounds overweight.

I have done nothing about it the last 8 months. I have many excuses. It is hard getting used to having a new baby! I work a lot (4 jobs to be exact) and it’s hard to find time to take care of myself. I have a picky husband and who has time to cook two meals? I don’t have the money for good food. Shouldn’t I just wait and the 9 months on, 9 months off rule will naturally happen?

I tried a few things. Yet instead of losing weight, I started gaining my baby weight back! It bothered me that I can never feel sexy or beautiful for my husband, that I can’t fit into any of my clothes, that clothes shopping is a nightmare because nothing fits over my big belly, that I can’t cover up my bulges, how I don’t have the energy for my son. Finally, at a routine doctor’s visit I found myself waiting on the doctor for 30 minutes (as is annoyingly typical). Out of panicky boredom I started reading the boring educational materials. There was a chart on the wall showing weight gain classifications. I found the column with my height, then found the column with my weight, I followed it over and…I was only a two pounds away from being labeled obese! I knew I was technically overweight, but obese?!?!

I know about obesity. I grew up in a family with a mother that struggled with obesity. The thing is, once you become obese it’s almost impossible to get that weight off. When you’re obese health problems keep popping up faster than you can medicate them. When you’re obese it's hard to swing at the park, go on rollercoasters, fly in an airplane, or play with your kids. I know how hard it was on my mother. She was never the type that just eats a whole tub of ice cream for breakfast. She has a disease and the pounds just slowly added up over the years. She just lost the battle more than she won it.

I swore long ago I would never let myself get to that point. I never honestly thought I would struggle with this. Yet, here I am 2 pounds away from joining my mother's struggle. That’s it! I’m fed up with all of it. I have the bug…

Would you like to hear what I’m going to do about it? Stayed tuned!